Anthony Bianco

The Amazing Race – Top 10 Travel Tips if Everyone Travelled Like Their Contestants

The Amazing Race Rules Of Travel!

I’m sure most travellers have tuned in at some time to view ‘The Amazing Race’ – where pairs of contestants (only from the United States!) travel around the world in discreet stages, trying to win one million dollars if they finish first.

The Amazing Race is a made for TV ‘reality show’ has been running for many years, and has been attracting large viewing audiences – including people who love the show, and those who think it’s just plain ridiculous.

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You can even purchase past seasons of The Amazing Race at Amazon.

But when I was recently watching The Amazing Race on TV, something dawned on me – what if every single traveller in the world travelled like The Amazing Race contestants?

This would create a number of Funny Travel Tips that could be passed onto us mere travel mortals.

The Amazing Race Travel Tips

So here they are – The Top 10 Travel Tips if Everyone Travelled Like The Amazing Race Contestants.

  1. Speaking English with a loud, slow voice will automatically make non-English speakers understand you.
  2. Travel itineraries can indeed be determined by a series of yellow envelopes removed from partially hidden black boxes, just like The Amazing Race.
  3. Each day travelling abroad must finish on a square pad, with an assigned travel ranking.
  4. If the before mentioned travel ranking is Number One, a high five with your travel partner is mandatory.
  5. You would know how to say ‘very fast’ in every conceivable language to every single taxi driver in the world.
  6. Travelling must be done in pairs, with a mandatory stereotype attached such as ‘Ex Partners’, ‘Beef Cakes’, or ‘Dwarf Stuntmen’
  7. Booking an airfare in advance will never be necessary ever again – just turning up to an airline counter at the airport will suffice.  There will always be a spare seat on the plane.
  8. Many travel days will start at about 2.30 in the morning.
  9. At least one physical challenge would need to be completed each day – which may include dragging your travel partner to make him/her go faster. And
  10. Every single day would be described as a ‘fantastic cultural experience’ – even though you spent the entire day running or driving fast.

The Amazing Race – Your Tips?

Can you relate to any of The Amazing Race Travel Tips, or do you have your own?

If so, leave a comment!

Other dodgy Travel Tips you can also take no notice of like my The Amazing Race article – take the best Travel Gadget ever (the Fart Machine), and my 52 Offbeat Travel Tips.

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About Anthony The Travel Tart

The Travel Tart writes about the funny, offbeat and weird aspects of world travel today. Travel wasn't meant to be taken too seriously! Check out ways to say hi below or sign up for his silly newsletter!

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11 Responses to The Amazing Race – Top 10 Travel Tips if Everyone Travelled Like Their Contestants

  1. Ren says:

    LOL. LOVE The Amazing Race. I’m amazed that in all 14 seasons of the show, they’ve shown the immigration line exactly ONCE (though then again, nothing exciting ever happens on the immigration line).

    Oh, and possibly the biggest tip: IF you need to pee, but you’re trying to catch something (a train, a bus, a slot in the Final Three and a chance to race for a million dollars in the final leg), HOLD IT IN.
    .-= Ren´s last blog ..TravelTuesday Picture of the Week: NBA Hoop Dreams in Vigan =-.

  2. Could you actually imagine the consequences of travelling in this manner. It seems that rule number one is to be as rude as humanly possible to all natives of whichever country they happen to be visiting. The most hilarious example was a contestant in who in the typical idiotic manner of all contestants shouted in the slow-get-your-point-across manner “we need to go to the airport” to which the confused native replied “we speak English in New Zealand”! The worrying thing is that people might actually see this show and start adopting the practices of the contestants. Fortunately the experiences of the contestants must seem so traumatic that they will never venture abroad again. We can breath a big sigh of relief knowing we won’t have to bump into those abrasive characters.

  3. Cool tips and I love the theme/background. Makes me want to head to the nearest beach, especially since its wintertime and cold out.
    -Jack

  4. I have seen this happen, at least a few of these things like gringos yelling at sales people or waitresses here in Medellin. yelling is not a translator, people think Americans are crazy! lol. Fortunately the people in Medellin Colombia are very patient and friendly to foriegners.

    Agendas are for the office and not for traveling. Rushing from point a to point b you will surely miss out on the culture.

    Great tips mate!

  5. Laura Ames-Carder says:

    ok so The Amazon Race sounds like a real laugh! I would actually love to do it just for the hell of it, just to say ja Ive done it! got the T-shirt! brilliant! I wonder how much it costs though? but I agree if you are going to see a country, dont piss about, do it properly! Take you time! Plan carefully!

  6. Liz says:

    you would also have to wear outfits which coordinated with your travelling companion, and are skimpy enough to offend locals in conservative countries.

  7. australia travel tips says:

    Traveling always need to be done in a proper way rather than messing it up. Thanks for sharing the tips which are absolutely necessary for one when they travel to some unknown country.

  8. Mark says:

    Actually that would make a great concept for a travel agent to promote a packaged tour. It is not unlike car rally’s where we are not sure of final destination, however, there are clues and signs given and once you reach the point another sign and clue is given until you reach your final destination. I really like this idea.

  9. Hans Kortlevers says:

    Hahaha, I really love your post. I can relate to all the rules you put there.

  10. Ha! What a great post. It is true. No. 1 being the most annoying one!

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